Selfish Vixens

Can the Society accept that girls can be really selfish to play around with the feelings of guys?  I would be skeptical if I were not the witness to few cases.  The level of the selfishness of the females involved in this cases was at such a height that I was shocked.  One of them somewhat similar to what was portrayed in the Movie Aitraaz (starring Akshay Kumar, Kareena Karpoor and Priyanka Chopra) and then there were few cases that could be well related to the Movie Pyaar Ka Panchnama.

I know the readers might think that why this guy is writing on this aspect when from ages guys have been Using girls for their purposes, be it family matters or Male ego or any other reason.  But what I am trying to highlight in this post is the way the girls have started Using guys who show a slight tender and care towards them.  I am certainly not opining on what is right or wrong.....be it a guy using a girls for his purpose or a girl using a guy for her purpose, its certainly a sign of materialistic and opportunistic society, not the regular society that we would love to be part of. 

So, The first case that I hinted about rocked my senses like anything.  The female was exploiting the situation to her benefit even though she is married to someone in a respectable job.  She was indulged in Extra-Marital relationship with this guy incidentally he also is married.  The female went to the limits of blackmailing the guy, strange ain't it??  I could not even understand the motive behind the behavior or the female involved, I mean she threatening the guy about committing suicide and all that stuff, for what?? Now this is something that I have not heard of even if a guy would have threatened a girl...

The other cases were more so common these days. I guess it has become a routine for me to talk to or chat with these guys who need a helping hand to come out of their shattered state of mind after realizing that the girl with whom they had been going around for ages was involved in just a time-pass.  Well my standard question to them is - "Do you think she is hanging around because you ask her out? or because she wants to hang around with you?"  the answers are not that important to share here, but yeah they really are more or less similar.

One such recent case that came to me was of this particular guy who was in love with a girl who was his schoolmate and they had been a company that people would always envy.  But this day when he proposed her, she told him that she already loves someone. The guy took it in his stride and they still were a good company to each other.  Suddenly the behavior of the girl changed towards the guy making the guy feel she loves him.  When he asked her the question, she told him to wait for sometime.  Then one fateful day the girl tells the guy that she doesn't love him but as they had been a good company for this long, she was trying to get away with the betrayal she was served in her affair by the other guy.  She confessed to him that she sought his support and she was playing with his feeling to get away with own problems.  The guy was shocked, though didn't react in front of the girl but once back home, he tried committing suicide by cutting his wrist.  He was rushed to the hospital and he survived.  I came to know of this case from him friends when I asked them the reason of his extreme step after donating my blood to save his life. I suggested to them that if the girl tries to get near him, they need to show her the door and ensure that she never gets to meet him.

There is the third sort of case which is comic as well as tragic. This case is about this female who thought her love life was ruined because of this particular guy who was her boyfriend's friend.  She felt that this guy is being spoil sport and because of him, she and her boyfriend are not able to spend quality time together.  Strangely she dumped her boyfriend and married this guy to revenge him.  And she made his life miserable by all means she could.  The guy thought, with time she would get over with her violent ways, but nothing positive came out of it. He patiently waited for ten years with no physical relation between them, yes they used to live under the same roof as legally wedded husband and wife, but they had separate bedrooms.  And one fine day he find out that she still has relations with her ex boyfriend and they still are seeing each other.  Yeah the another case of extra marital affair of a female. The guy simply packs his bags and leaves the house with a note for the female that if she wishes he is ready to give her the divorce and transfer the house on her name with some monthly maintenance.  The female was shocked with the treatment and she committed suicide leaving a note of apology to the guy she was married to.

I mean these incidents and many more that I can recount give me a real shock to believe in or trust any female around.

And then they say - Men are dogs.....what would say after reading the cases above??? What are Women turning out to be then????

From Acquaintence to Love

Before I start about the stuff that is hinted in the title of this post, let me make it pretty clear to those who believe in Love at First Sight, this is not the post that might please you as I Don't believe in Love at First Sight.  For me that is purely Infatuation or Lust as it goes by the Physical Appearance or similar stuff that catches your sight and pleases your eyes first.

Coming back to the point, Love claimed is a phenomenon that in my opinion matures with time and comes to an age with time.  For the perspective I look at and understand Love, it starts from mutual acquaintance to mutual admiration to mutual liking and then one reaches the stage that we call Love.

It is pretty interesting to observe how few of us cover the journey of being acquainted to being a couple in short span of time and there are others who take more time and do it at a slower pace.  I for that matter believe in the slower pace of getting acquainted, then getting to know the likes and dislikes, interests & hobbies and other qualities that my counterpart would have. Well, certainly in today's fast paced lifestyle people like me are more often known as Laggards and I simply laugh at that.  Why?? Well simply because the people calling the slow paced a laggard tend to forget that slow and steady wins the race.

For the fast paced cases of love I have often seen that even after proclaiming to be in love, there are many differences between them and they more often waste time in sorting out those issues than spending quality time with each other and complimenting the deficiencies in each other.  The slow paced or the so called laggards ensure that when they are understanding the person before proclaiming their love, they do understand the deficiencies in the person's nature / behavior / capabilities etc and then ensure that they would love to support person they love in the areas where he / she would need their help / assistance....

So if I actually look at the three types of Lovers -

1. Those who believe in Love at First Sight
2. Those who are Fast at Proclaiming
3. Those who are Slow Paced or Laggards 

I derive an opinion that Love at First Sight changes with the change in Sight :)), Fast Paced Switch out of their relations equally fast and then they rue about the misdemeanor by their EX and the slow paced or the Laggards relish the company complimenting each other and even if they have to depart from each other, they do not rue.  They simply take it in their stride and move on with life, certainly remembering the moments relished in the glory of past.  However, I have certainly witnessed cases of Pre-nuptial departure in the first two cases that actually Go Sour, I have not witnessed a single  case where the Pre-nuptial departure would have ever gone sour.  I have actually witnessed the cases where the people from third case as mentioned above are friends rather family friends even after their marriages... and that has kept their respective marriage bond strong......